VB couple sues adoption agency

VIRGINIA BEACH, Va. (WAVY) - Chip and Julie Harshaw vividly remember the first time they met a little 18-month-old boy named Roman in a Russian orphanage.

It was December 2003.

"I remember squatting on the floor with some toys and hoping he would want to come over and interact with us which he did," Julie Harshaw said.

The adoption was arranged by Bethany Christian Services --the largest adoption service in the country. The Virginia Beach couple made it clear to Bethany in their application that they wanted to adopt a child with a good prognosis for normal development. They put their trust in the agency and were assured Roman was fine.

"Our case worker had told us their doctor had gone over to see him physically examined him and that he was healthy and on target," said Chip Harshaw.

A month later, Roman settled into his new surroundings, immediately doting on his big brother Daniel. But over the next several years, the Harshaws say Roman developed from an on-the-go toddler to a child prone to violent tantrums.

"It would happen over anything and everything," said Julie.

There is a hole in his bedroom wall where the couple says Roman slams the door. He pulled several of his baby teeth out with a pen cap and threatened his sister Grace several times.

"Roman went over and grabbed a two-by-four on the side and came up behind her and she had her back to him and he was going to hit her with it to stop her from leaving."

The Harshaws took Roman to many doctors and eventually a specialist diagnosed him with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome . Last year, they filed a federal lawsuit against Bethany Christian Services. In legal documents obtained by WAVY.com, the Harshaws claim Bethany misrepresented Roman's health.

"First they said, 'Oops Dr. Dubrosky never saw Roman,' then they said, "Would you consider dissolving the adoption?'" said Chip.

Bethany Christian Services refused to comment on the Harshaws case but sent WAVY.com the following statement:

"Bethany Christian Services works with adoptive families before, during, and after the adoption of a child. Bethany takes seriously all concerns that adoptive parents may have. We stand behind our legacy of quality adoption services and commitment to child welfare for more than 65 years.

"In regard to specific cases, Bethany Christian Services has to abide by confidentiality laws, such as HIPAA, and professional ethics in social work. Therefore, it is our practice that we cannot comment about services that pertain to a specific family and child without their written permission."

It has been years since candid snapshots of life's little moments filled the family's living room. Vacations are a thing of the past. Most moments now are spent dealing with Roman.

"He creates so much stress in the house that we feel we have nothing left to give to the other kids at the end of the day."

The Harshaws say giving Roman up is not an option. Occasionally, there's a side of him, a small piece who calls them Mom and Dad that they cling to and love. For them, that is worth fighting for no matter the outcome.

Roman is currently under evaluation at a hospital near Williamsburg. The Harshaws said they have no idea what will happen when he comes home in the next few months.

The couple says Roman will require supervision the rest of his life, and any award from the lawsuit will go to cover that cost.

WAVY.com spoke to Sam Totaro, a nationally recognized adoption attorney, to find out what options parents have who find themselves in a similar situation.

• Parents should understand no child coming from overseas is healthy and on target
• Parents should always question that statement and get up-to-date information
• Seek independent legal advice from an experienced adoption attorney
• Take medical information to an adoption medical specialist
• If your gut says something is wrong, it usually is
• Parents should not put all their faith and trust into an agency
• Ask questions
• Find out how much personal contact the agency has with the foreign country.

After adoption, Totaro says don't believe the agency if you're told "the child needs a little love and he/she will grow out of it."

If there's a problem, seek a specialist. Be up front and tell the agency immediately if there is an issue. Press the agency if you're told additional records or information is not available.

The Harshaw's case will go before a Michigan judge in May. Count on WAVY.com to continue to follow the developments.